Overcoming Challenges

Parenting in general is no walk in the park.  Throw autism into the mix and suddenly that walk turns into a full-on obstacle course, complete with unexpected detours, pit stops and the occasional (ok, frequent) spilled coffee.  But here is the thing:  we parents are built tough.  Sure, we may wobble at times, but we don’t fall.  We rise, we adapt and we conquer…even if we do it with bags under our eyes and mismatched socks.

I know firsthand that being the parent of a child on the autism spectrum is one of the most profound and challenging experiences life can offer.  The sleepless nights, the endless appointments, the juggling of emotions – both our own and our child’s, and the constant battle to create an environment where they can thrive.  It is a lot.  But I want you to know, you are doing a stellar job.  Seriously.  And just in case no one has told you today, let me say it – I see you and I applaud you.

Overcoming Challenges

So, let’s dive into some of the most common challenges we face as parents of autistic children and more importantly, how we can overcome them.  Grab a cup of tea (or that coffee you had to reheat for the third time) and let’s get real.

• The overwhelm is real. Oh, the overwhelm.  There are days when it feels like the world is spinning a bit too fast.  The constant to-do list, the therapies, the school meetings and let’s not forget managing the household.  Some days, it’s like we are trying to balance a stack of plates on our head while someone throws new ones at us.
• But here is the silver lining:  you don’t have to catch every plate.  It is ok to let some things slide.  Focus on what is truly important.  It is easy to get caught up in the daily grind, but stepping back and prioritizing is key.  Maybe today’s win is just getting through the day with everyone fed and loved.  That’s enough.

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• The isolation. Let’s be honest, sometimes it can feel a bit lonely.  Other parents might not understand why your child reacts a certain way or why a trip to the grocery store feels like preparing for battle.  You night feel out of sync with your friends, whose parents’ experiences look very different from yours.
• The solution?  Find your tribe.  Surround yourself with people who get it.  Whether it is a local support group, an online community or just one friend who really understands. Having someone to lean on makes all the difference.  There’s nothing quite like being able to text a fellow parent at 2am and say, “Is it just me or has today been the longest day ever?” and get a response back that makes you laugh.

Overcoming Challenges

• The guilt monster. Ah, the guilt.  If you are a parent, you are probably on a first-name basis with it.  Maybe you feel guilty for not doing enough or for feeling tired or for not having all the answers.  Or perhaps on those particularly tough days, you feel guilty for feeling frustrated.  Spoiler alert:  You are human.
• Here is the thing, it is ok to feel what you feel.  Parenting an autistic child is incredibly rewarding, but it is also tough.  It is important to acknowledge those emotions without beating yourself up.  Allow yourself grace.  You are doing your best and your best is good enough.  Actually, it is more than good enough – it’s amazing.

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• The endless advocacy. Being an advocate for your child is one of the most important roles you will take on.  You become their voice in situations where they may not have one, whether it’s at school, with healthcare providers or even with extended family.  While advocacy is empowering, it’s also exhausting.  It feels like you are always in “battle mode”, fighting to make sure your child’s needs are understood and met.
• Take a deep breath.  You don’t have to win every battle in a day.  Remember, it is a marathon, not a sprint.  Equip yourself with knowledge, surround yourself with people who support you and take breaks when you need to.  Your strength doesn’t come from constantly being on the frontlines, it comes from knowing when to rest and recharge, too.

Overcoming Challenges

• The uncertainty of the future. The future can feel like a giant question mark.  What will life look like for your child in 5, 10, 20 years?  Will they be independent?  Will they be happy?  The unknown can be terrifying.
• But let’s bring it back to the present for a second.  As much as we want to plan and prepare for the future, sometimes all we can do is focus on today.  What does your child need today?  What do you need today?  It is ok not to have all the answers right now.  Trust that you are laying the foundation for a bright future by simply loving and supporting your child each day.

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Taking care of you. Let’s not forget one of the biggest challenges:  remembering to take care of yourself.  Yes, you.  Self-care often feels like a luxury when you’re managing a household, therapies and everything else, but it’s not a luxury, it’s a necessity.

• You can’t pour from an empty cup, as they say.  Whether it’s sneaking in a few minutes of quiet in the morning, going for a walk or even binge-watching a show after everyone’s asleep, find what recharges you and do it unapologetically.  You deserve it.  More than that – you need it to keep showing up as the incredible parent that you are.

So, keep going.  Laugh when you can, cry when you need to and don’t be afraid to let some plates fall.  You’ve got this-mismatched socks and all.

Till next week.

A

Xxx

If you are ready to do more than just overcome challenges, if you really want to create an amazing life for you and your child and you are ready to do the work, this is the perfect time to sign up for a free consult. Click HERE.

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