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Expectations
EXPECTATIONS
Do you expect certain things from your partner, or friend or boss? And what happens when they don’t do what you expect? Are you mad, sad, disappointed?
Think about this, you are a human being here on earth experiencing a variety of things and feelings and along the line you have made up your mind about things as fact or as true or as wrong. Your partner, for example, has the exact same experiences and in his mind things are a certain way, but completely different from yours. Are you wrong, is he wrong? No, it’s just different. You are just different. The problem comes in when you have expectations of each other and the other does not react the way you expect them to. And ladies, this will happen, we are human having human experiences. What happens when someone does not react according to your “rules”? Do you get angry, offended, hurt? For most of us the answer is yes, but does the other person get angry, offended or hurt? Probably not! So who is negatively affected by this….we are.
You have to let people be themselves and not expect them to act a certain way in order for you to feel good. You are the only one responsible for your thoughts and feelings. It is most definitely not the other persons responsibility. And this is great news, ladies. This means that there is no person on this earth who has that authority over you. It is a game changer, being responsible for your own feelings and showing up in this incredible way. You will have a sense of flowing and ease and letting the world be what it is.
Just think about how boring the world would be if everyone was the same, had the same thoughts, liked the same things or liked the same people. People have the freedom to choose for themselves and to be who they want to be. It does not mean that you have to agree with them, or condone their bad behaviour or have no personal boundaries. You just get to not be offended or walk around all upset about stuff. They get to be who they are.
But perhaps if we could be aware of this we may see things a little differently. If you do get upset or offended, ask yourself why. Get curious. What are you expecting and why? How is this impacting you? Is it a big deal for you? Is it worth it? Is it worth being angry, upset or mad about? I can tell you this kind of frustration is not good for the soul and definitely not in line with living a beautiful life.
Yes you do have values, boundaries, thoughts and feelings about things, but you decide what you make this mean in your life. In the same token, people can be offended by stuff you do or say and that is their prerogative too, let them, that is their choice. Don’t make that mean anything about you. You can’t please everyone. But be open to other people’s opinions, this is how you learn. Take what you like out of it, discard the rest.
If you are open to other people and their opinions, likes and dislikes, this creates more ease in the world, kind of like spreading the love around even though you don’t always agree. Is this not a better way to co-exist? This is respect. This is grace. This is way better than walking around looking for things to be upset about and angry about, just because you expected something different.
Even though we are all different, most of us fundamentally want the same things, love, peace, a sense of community, a safe and healthy environment. Our expectations around these things though, differ from person to person. My expectation of love may be dinner and a movie, yours may be a thoughtful gift. Neither is wrong, just different.
So, next time when you have expectations from someone, be a little more aware that you may not get the outcome you expected and see how that makes you feel. It is totally OK to let people go if you think that their values and beliefs are not in line with yours. It does not mean that you have to cause or feel drama around it, you can just let it go.
Have a wonderful day further ladies and thank you for reading.
A
xxx
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