Do it anyway ~ Blog
Why do you think you are not getting the results you are wanting? In a nutshell, it’s because you are avoiding a feeling or an emotion.
Do it anyway
Why do you think you are not getting the results you are wanting? In a nutshell, it’s because you are avoiding a feeling or an emotion. It’s not because you can’t do something, or you don’t have the money, or you are not capable. There are plenty of people with less money, less opportunities, less capabilities that get things done.
Think about why you want anything.
If you want to be fit and healthy, why? You will look better, feel better, your clothes will feel better, you will have more energy…notice all these things are because of the feeling you are after. If you want more money, why? You can buy things that will make you feel better, make your life easier, you may be able to command more respect, be taken seriously. Again, it’s the feelings you get from having more money.
Whatever it is for you that you would like, think about what the feeling is that you want, that that thing will give you. So what are feelings? All they are, is a sensation in your body. Some feelings feel really good, like happiness, contentment, elation, excitement, etc. Some don’t feel great, like sadness, embarrassment, shame, guilt, fear, etc. These feelings are often very uncomfortable and a little painful. But not the kind of painful that you need painkillers, although a lot of you do things to make the pain go away, like overeating, over drinking, drugs.
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Feelings will not kill you
These feelings will not kill you, at most they are just extremely uncomfortable. So we tend to avoid these feelings at all costs. If you think that going out there and selling something will cause you to feel embarrassed, you may not want to do that. You are then effectively trying to avoid the feeling of embarrassment, so you don’t sell that thing. However, if you really want to make the money from selling your goods and that feeling is more positive, you may choose to go ahead and sell and risk the feeling of embarrassment.
Yes you may feel all the negative feelings when you are growing or doing things that are outside your comfort zone, but in the end is it not worth it when you know you will achieve your goals? Feeling negative emotions are not a sign that you are on the wrong path, it is just your brain trying to keep you safe and in your little cave. But we don’t need saving anymore, we just need to get out there and go after our goals.
The only time you will go towards your goals is if the pain of staying out ways the pain of moving forward. For example, say you stayed in a cave on your own, you are safe yet you are very lonely. You want to meet someone, have company. You can stay in your cave and be safe or you could risk going out and meeting someone. At some point you may decide it is worth the risk and actually leave your cave and find some company.
Do it anyway
You may feel an immense amount of fear, but you do it anyway. The same goes for any worthwhile goal you have. The first time you go out there and do something it is super scary (remember scary just means a feeling), yet you go do it anyway. The next time you go out it may be a little less scary, but now you have evidence that you can do it, you can go after your goals.
The chances are most of the time you are going to fail and that is ok. You should fail, it’s part of life. Failing is normal, it helps you grow. If you are not failing, you are not living. There is no shame in failing and even if you do feel shame because something didn’t work out the way you hoped, it’s only a feeling. Don’t push it away or ignore it or overeat it away. Just feel it, it won’t kill you and by allowing the feeling, it will eventually go away. The next time you feel it, you know what to do with it and you may even welcome it because it means you are doing something with your life.
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
Till next week.
A
Xxx
If you would like to explore the topic a little more with me, or even if you don’t agree, let me know. I want to hear from you. Email me at hello@lliautism.net
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