Are you living in integrity?
On quite a few occasions I have spoken about your future self. Your future self is the person you want to become, the one who makes all the money, the one who has lost all the weight, the one who has achieved that goal. Â
Are you living in integrity?
What is integrity? Wikipedia describes it as “the practice of being honest and showing a consistent and uncompromising adherence to strong moral and ethical principles and values. In ethics, integrity is regarded as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one’s actions.” This is such an interesting definition, as it implies living within your own framework of principles and values.
So what do your principles and values consist of? Have you even thought about it? Most of us have a general idea of what those are. You may be fairly strict with yourself when it comes to doing what you say you are going to do, but not so much with your boundaries, for example.
That does not mean it’s good or bad. It just means that the one principle you view more highly than the other. Perhaps, this is not at all how you want to do it though.
What is important to you
That’s why it is important to decide for yourself what you value and what is important to you. I think most of us don’t really know and go through life without fully understanding why you are not happy with some things.
A good example of this is the 5 love languages. I am sure most of you have heard of them. You can take a test based on a series of questions of what you value more than others and it will kick out what your top love language is. Mine is quality time, followed closely by physical touch. Now if my fiancé spends time with me, this could look like just being in the same room reading, I feel loved. The same for physical touch. If he squeezes my hand or gives me hugs, I feel loved. What if he buys me a chocolate or cooks for me (which he does all the time)? Those are all part of the love languages and I appreciate them and love these gestures, but I value quality time and physical touch more.
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Hi, I’m Antoinette Porter, your hostess at Live Life Inspired where we will explore what is possible in your life. A life you can look back on and say, “Wow!! I did that!”
Being truthful and honest with yourself
You are the only person who knows if you are being truthful and honest with yourself. Again most of us think we should want and do things that perhaps society wants us to do and often we just blindly follow what others are doing. We don’t stop and think if this is actually what we want, or if it is the path we want to follow. What often happens is that we have this quiet sense of restlessness, discontent, a feeling that something is not right, when we are not on our path.
The only way to change that is to be completely honest with yourself. What do you like, what works for you, what lights your fire. What does not serve you anymore, what would you like to change. Find out what characteristics you like for yourself and in yourself.
Once you get to know yourself, you can start changing the things you do not like. I have to mention that often times we do not know what we want and we have to try different things on, like trying on clothes and see what fits and what doesn’t.
Create being in integrity with yourself.
You can start by keeping promises to yourself. By taking care of yourself. By setting up healthy boundaries. By loving yourself. You would never treat a loved one with contempt or dismissal or put them last. Why do that with yourself?
We tolerate a lot of things that are really not cool.
Perhaps the boss shouts at you because she is having a bad day or your boyfriend makes a nasty joke at your expense and you just brush it off. We need to set loving boundaries for ourselves. This is the place to be firm with our values and say no, I don’t except this kind of behaviour and make a decision to perhaps walk away from the situation or ask for an apology.
Now the other person may not apologise and that is on them, but you enforced the boundary for yourself. Next time something like this happens, you know how you will react. You will be integrity with yourself. It is consistent adherence to your values.
What values are important to you and how are you not living in integrity? Lots to ponder.
Till next week.
A
Xxx
I am hosting an Autism Workshop on 29th October for mama’s of autistic kiddies. It is a series of Workshops which deals with all the struggles we deal with and how to handle them with courage and finesse. From overwhelm to judgement to isolation, etc. And of course it is a fun get together, over some coffee and cake and become each other’s support systems.Â
If you can spare a couple of hours click HERE to book your spot. You are welcome to bring anyone along who may be interested.
