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Are you easily offended
ARE YOU EASILY OFFENDED?
I used to be. There was a time when someone would just look at me in a funny way and I would get insulted. I did a lot of work around this and now it is rather hard to offend me. But, I do get my moments where I still get triggered. Now I look at myself with grace and compassion, knowing that it is quite ok and knowing how far I have come.
Being offended means you have all these rules or manuals for other people, how they should be and how they should behave. If they don’t behave you want them to, you are offended. Crazy right? We can’t control other people and giving them the power over your emotions is insane. You are just causing yourself so much unnecessary pain and upset. Expecting other people to follow your rules is thinking you have the moral high ground.
The good news is you can change it, just by changing your thinking.
Make how you feel and how you think your number one priority and don’t outsource that to anyone else. You don’t want everyone to do and be like you are. What a boring world we would be living in, life is a contrast. Let people do what they want and be who they are. Now it does not mean you have to agree with them or condone their behaviour. Just don’t be offended and go around looking for things to be upset about.
Want to chat?
Please Ladies, if anyone needs coaching, contact me. I am learning at the moment so all the sessions are free for now. Sessions are between 20-30minutes in length.
This may seem short, but you will be surprised at how much can be accomplished.
My Journal
Every day has a “Mmmoment…” to write down your thoughts of gratitude, your belly-tingling thought of the day or just something that makes you smile.
Be curious
If you are a person who is easily offended, take this opportunity to be curious about it. Why are you offended? What did the person do? What did they say? What did you expect? What is it costing you to be offended? How do you show up then? I used to get frustrated and angry or sad, but choosing this was no fun. This does not mean you don’t have values or opinions or beliefs, but expecting others to have those same qualities is unfair.
Every one of us gets to decide what is important to us and how we want to think. It may not be the same as yours, but it is every bit as important to them.
Remember when someone is offended by something you said or did, it usually has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. You can decide if that person is really important to you and you still want that person in your life, then go ahead and discuss the issue. Be curious and find out why she is offended. What did she make it mean? How did she interpret the situation? This keeps the lines of communication open, to create a space with the intention of understanding each other.
Get comfortable with the idea.
There are going to be people who just don’t like what you stand for or what you like, but there will be plenty of people who will. Get comfortable with the idea. Other people are going to be offended by you. They may not like your choices and that’s ok. You get to make your choices and if it makes you happy and you know in your heart that it is good, do it. Yes your choices may not always be perfect, but you are a human being with human experiences, you won’t always do it right.
Be open to other peoples’ choices and opinions. They may not be yours, but you can be happy for them or even excited for them. You do not have to tell them they are wrong and a terrible person. See the difference here? Just being open to someone else’s opinion feels a lot better than being offended.
Be a person who is open and loving, creating the space for other people. The world is not black or white, think about having a beautiful gray area in between where everyone can get together and just be who they are and still have that mutual respect for each other. Would this not create a better world?
Imagine walking through life and looking for joy, optimism and love, instead of things that offend you that cause you to be upset. It actually takes way more energy to look for the negative than it is to look for the positive in the world. We so need more love in the world right now.
Be thankful for different perspectives. Be compassionate with others and yourself.
Ladies, let me know if you have someone who takes offence or are you a person who is easily offended. If you would like some coaching, I can help you.
Till next week.
A
💜❤🤍💛