Learning to Accept Life as It Is (and Still Dream Bigger)

Acceptance is one of those words that sounds soft and gentle…
but in reality, it asks a great deal of us.

For a long time, I thought acceptance meant giving up.
Like surrendering effort. Like admitting defeat.

“I guess this is just how it is.”

But life, and especially parenting, has taught me something very different.

True acceptance is not passive.
It’s active.
It requires presence, courage, and effort.

And paradoxically, it’s one of the most powerful things you can practise if you want to create a calmer, more fulfilling life.

There’s a quote by Eckhart Tolle that I return to often:

“Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it.”

That sentence alone can stop you in your tracks.
Because depending on what your present moment looks like, that can feel like a very big ask.

But let’s explore what acceptance really means, and why it might be the key to both peace and possibility.

Acceptance Is Not Giving Up

When most people hear the word acceptance, they think of resignation.

But acceptance is not saying, “I like this.”
It’s saying, “This is what’s true right now, and I’m willing to meet it without fighting it.”

So much of our suffering doesn’t come from what happens, but from the thought:

This shouldn’t be happening.

When we argue with reality, we add a whole extra layer of pain.

Acceptance removes that layer.

It doesn’t mean you stop wanting change.
It means you stop wasting energy fighting what already is.

Here’s a simple practice that can shift everything:

Think of one thing in your life that feels hard to accept right now.
And gently say to yourself:

“I consent.”

Just that.

“I consent to what is.”

Notice how different that feels from resistance.
That small shift brings you back into presence and steadiness.

Accepting the Past Takes Courage

Now let’s stretch acceptance a little further.

What if we applied that same idea to the past?

“Whatever your past contains, accept it as if you had chosen it.”

This is where acceptance becomes brave.

Most of us have moments we wish had gone differently.
Things we said. Things we didn’t know. Times we were exhausted, scared, or overwhelmed.

Arguing with the past doesn’t change it.
But accepting it frees you from dragging it into the present.

Acceptance doesn’t mean approving of what happened.
It means saying:

I stop fighting what was. I take back my energy.

Ask yourself gently:

• Where am I still arguing with my past?
• What would it feel like to say, “I consent to the version of me who did the best she could”?

This is where healing begins.

Accepting Other People (and Their Behaviour)

This one can be challenging.

What if you allowed other adults to be exactly who they are, without trying to change them?

Acceptance is not agreement.
It’s peace.

When we resist other people’s behaviour, we often believe we’re protecting ourselves.
But in truth, we’re just exhausting ourselves.

People are allowed to think what they think.
Say what they say.
Be who they are.

Acceptance doesn’t mean you stay, or approve, or applaud.
It simply means you stop giving their behaviour authority over your nervous system.

And that kind of acceptance creates freedom.

Accepting the Present Moment

Acceptance is most powerful in the here and now.

It can sound like:

• “I consent to this hard morning.”
• “I consent to feeling tired today.”
• “I consent to things not going to plan.”

When you stop fighting the present, you regain your creative energy.

Resistance drains us.
Acceptance steadies us.

And from steadiness, clarity and choice return.

There have been days in my own life where everything unravelled.
Plans fell apart. Emotions ran high. Nothing flowed.

And the moment I said, “I accept this day as if I had chosen it,” something softened.

Not because the day changed.
But because I did.

Accepting Yourself

This may be the hardest and most important piece.

Can you accept yourself exactly as you are right now?

Not the future version.
Not the more rested version.
Not the version who has it all figured out.

This one.

Acceptance is not the enemy of growth.
It’s the foundation for it.

What if you could look at yourself with compassion and say:

I consent to this version of me. She is learning. She is enough.

When you accept yourself, you model that same gentleness for your children.
You show them that worth is not conditional.

Acceptance and Dreaming Bigger

Here’s the paradox.

When you practise acceptance of your past and present, you build the emotional capacity to accept a better future.

Many people struggle not because they can’t imagine something better, but because they can’t allow it.

Acceptance creates capacity.

Ask yourself:

• Can I accept that calm is possible?
• Can I accept that ease might be available to me?
• Can I accept that life could feel lighter?

Try this practice:

Think of something you deeply want.
And say:

“I consent to this possibility.”

That’s how we plant seeds.
Not by forcing.
But by allowing.

Acceptance as a Daily Practice

Acceptance is not a one-time decision.
It’s a daily choice.

Some days it looks like deep breathing in the car.
Other days it’s letting go of guilt.
Sometimes it’s simply saying, “Alright life, I see you.”

Over time, this practice builds resilience, trust, and inner steadiness.

Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be meaningful.
And your story doesn’t have to be easy to be extraordinary.

A Gentle Invitation

If you’re ready to practise this work more deeply, you don’t have to do it alone.

Inside my 1:1 VIP coaching experience, we work gently and powerfully with:

• Thought patterns
• Emotional regulation
• Energy and capacity
• Creating a future that feels calm, intentional, and aligned

Change doesn’t have to be hard.
With the right guidance, it can feel steady, supported, and surprisingly easeful.

If you feel the pull, you’re welcome to book a free consultation or simply reach out via email.
We’ll take it one step at a time.

Accept what is.
Trust what’s unfolding.
And allow yourself to dream bigger.

With love,
Antoinette